Sunday, October 1 – October 7
This was a heavy week for me.
Sunday, October 1st
I don’t normally swim on Sundays, but I enjoyed the saltwater pool at the YMCA so much that I decided to enjoy one more swim there before heading out. After my swim, I popped back over to Kevin’s to pack up everything and express gratitude for an amazing weekend. Before leaving, I had a quick Skype call with my dad, and he and Kevin had a chance to exchange hellos and joke about not recognizing each other since both are retired and therefore out of uniform. 😂
Once out the door, I made it less than two miles before Kevin called to tell me I’d left something behind. 😬
He had been heading out the door shortly after I left and was only a few minutes away, so we met up in a nearby parking lot so I could collect the forgotten item… And off I went (again).
I popped back over to Poulsbo to stop at Poulsbo First Lutheran Church to walk their labyrinth (Yay!), then headed up to Bainbridge Island which had a couple different labyrinths I wanted to check out. On my way up there, a mere hour after meeting up with Kevin to pick up one forgotten item, Kevin called again to let me know he’d found another forgotten item 🤷🏽♀️- this time my jacket- in the backseat of his truck (skip the wisecracks, smarta$$e$ 🙄). Since I was halfway to Bainbridge Island, I promised to stop back over and pick it up on my way back through.
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MOMENT OF EXCEPTIONAL CANDOR: I lost my best friend Debbie to cancer in December of 2015. Her birthday is tomorrow, and as her birthday has drawn closer, it has been weighing on me more and more that I just want to spend her birthday with people who love her as much as I do.
In the midst of my labyrinth adventures today, I called Rachel (Debbie’s sister). They were in the car and she let me know that I was on speaker for all to hear. I shared my thoughts with her/them, asking if I could come to Portland to be with them. I explained that I knew it was short notice and that I knew she would need to talk with Andy (her husband) first, and that I wouldn’t be offended if the timing didn’t work for them, but that I just wanted to be with the family for Debbie’s birthday.
Rachel laughed- in the most loving of ways 🥰, and I could hear Andy in the background yelling, “It’s fine!” 😂. They let me know the guest room was already prepared for me.
I laughed, admittedly relieved, and confessed that I was already in my Tahoe and on the road heading their direction.I swore them both to secrecy about the trip and asked that they not tell Sara and Jim since I wanted my visit to be a surprise) and shared that I was breaking up the drive by stopping at some labyrinths along the way. I estimated I would arrive by dinner time. (Coincidence? I think not! 🍽🤣)
Plan in motion, I continued on, heart lighter. Knowing I would be spend the evening (and next couple days) with the Hispher/Becker clan cheered me immensely and I was not disappointed.
I arrived just in time for dinner 🎉 and was grateful to relax over dinner with Rachel, Andy and the kiddos. Once the kids retired for the evening, the three of us chatted a while longer before retiring for the evening.
Monday, October 2nd
Today is my best friend Debbie’s birthday. She would have been 50 if cancer had not taken her in 2015.
She is the first person I thought about when I woke up this morning.
It’s been almost eight years, and I still find myself wanting to reach for the phone to call or text. I often think about her when I log on to Skype, since that is how we stayed in contact when she lived in Hong Kong. I think about her a lot. I miss her immensely.
A good book makes me think of Debbie. Libraries make me think of Debbie. There are a million different things that make me think of Debbie. I’ve lost other friends and relatives to death, but losing Debbie was the singular greatest death of a loved one I’ve ever experienced. In a perfect world, we would have been celebrating her 50th birthday in some epically fun, but understated and elegant way. So I knew it was going to be a hard day.
When I woke, I got cleaned up quickly and went downstairs to chatted quietly with Andy, who is also an early bird. After some quiet conversation, I headed to the Sherwood Regional Family YMCA for my morning swim, and found (once again) that all the staff and members were welcoming. Despite the friendly folks there, it does not rank among my favorite YMCAs for several reasons (that I won’t go into). Nonetheless, I put in my hour of swim time before heading back to the house, where Rachel, Andy and I caught up over a lovely breakfast while young Mr. Becker entertained us.
I left there mid-morning and headed over to be with Debbie’s parents, Sara & Jim. When Jim answer the door, he jumped back in surprise, stunned.
“What are you doing here?” he asked, bewildered.
“It’s Debbie’s birthday today. I want to spend it with the people who love her as much as I do.” and I hugged him tightly.
He let me know that Sara was still in bed, and went in to rouse her. Once she was awake, I went in and the two of us sat awhile, hashing out things that had been weighing on each of us and redefining the expectations that come with loving others.
I spent the morning and early afternoon with Jim and Sara, and it was good to be with them. The three of us enjoyed lunch together, then Sara and I went out to meet Rachel and one of the young Mr. Becker’s at Powell’s Books (which was a favorite bookstore of Debbie’s) to honor her memory and indulge our bibliophilia.
I wrapped up the day with dinner back at Rachel and Andy’s home.
We’re all early risers, so we didn’t stay up too late, but I was grateful for all the little moments of time we were able to garner together.
Though my time with them was short, I was happy to have spent Debbie’s birthday with her family- people I consider my family, too.
Tuesday, October 3rd
I enjoyed a relaxing breakfast with Andy, Rachel and one of the Becker boys before heading out mid-morning. I know I needed to be back at the house for several appointments at the house Wednesday morning and wanted to beat traffic on both ends of the drive. Consequently, I decided to forgo my normal morning swim. (Easy decision since I wasn’t a fan of that particular YMCA location.) Instead, I opted to make the drive back to Everett, arriving in time for a late-afternoon swim at the Everett Family YMCA before heading back to C’s. place.
Wednesday, October 4th
I had planned to be at the house for the majority of the day waiting for a couple appointments that C. had scheduled to be here. Both were a bust (ugh!), so the day stayed low-key, and that was okay by me.
I had one client coaching call in the afternoon and my own business coaching call in the evening, and and I was able to get some more projects completed around the house. While it wasn’t the win I was looking for, they were wins nonetheless.
Thursday, October 5th
Low key & quiet day here–morning swim, a postponed coaching call occurred and more house projects knocked out.
It’s a little thing, but I am grateful for my YMCA membership. Swimming 5-6 days a week for an hour at a time has been exceptionally grounding and helpful to me. Sometimes we keep ourselves busy as a means of distraction from the thoughts in our head and the feelings in our heart. But sometimes we need to listen to the thoughts in our head and identify the “why’s” behind the feelings.
Friday, October 6th
Nothing noteworthy to share.
Saturday, October 7th
Nothing noteworthy to share.