Today’s Therapy Thursday is short and sweet, since lessons don’t need to be long to be impactful.
A University of Minnesota study showed that touch increases trust.
Of course, it is implied that ‘touch’ in this context refers to a good touch, a welcome touch and an appropriate touch.
So, how do you break past barriers using touch, especially during times in conflict? Here are some of the suggestions were given to me:
- Reinforce that you two are a team dealing with a problem, rather than a feeling of ‘me versus you’. You can do this by sitting next to the person (creating the ‘us’ dynamic), rather than sitting across from them.
- Use touch to create connection. A touch on the arm, hand, shoulder, etc. can be calming and reduce our stress, as well as increasing the release of the oxytocin, which can enhance bonding in certain circumstances.
More than anything, especially in times of conflict, it is important to remember that there is more value in preserving and maintaining the relationship than in winning the conflict.
So connect.
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